I might just start randomly inserting Hawaii photos into posts.
1. That thing on Monday went well. My first one was an early Monday morning procedure, too, so it was pretty much all the same doctors and nurses and a bajllion other medical professionals. The only person to express any human emotion was my doctor. She is so wonderful, you guys. She came in with wet hair (it was an early morning and she’s a REAL PERSON I LOVE IT) and was just like, “Guys. I’m so sorry you have to go through this again. It sucks so much.” She is kind and professional and so very human. She gives it to me straight and is super personable. I am beyond happy with her and her care. So nice after so much of this process has been so not happy. The ultrasound tech is also wonderful. I think she’ll be happier than I am if we ever get a baby that’s viable. (And if we don’t? Oh man. I don’t want to be the one to deliver the crushing news that we’re there for bad news once again.)
2. I feel a little bit like I’m walking around in a fog. Like, I keep waiting for my real life to begin (cue: Colin Hay). It’s just…I expected at the beginning of this year that I’d have a baby by the end (or be well on my way to having one). I had been throwing myself into work for a while, and the time came throw myself into family and now…I am lost. Pretend like I’m ambivalent about adding to our family and focus on stuff I do have control over (run! grow my business!) or pursue a second child to the exclusion of everything else? Now that blood work and testing and other medical stuff is getting involved, I just. I don’t know. I don’t really have the words to explain the complexity and depth of what I’m feeling right now and I worry that every time I try I’m doing those feelings a disservice by not articulating them well. Are you confused? Yeah, me, too.
3. I came thisclose to quitting my day job before the school year started. But I did not. My boss and coworkers know this. Most of my friends know this. I was really really reallllllly set on leaving. On being full-time Little Leaf, baby! But then Mike’s assistantship funding ended and his share of income isn’t as much, so I kept it. I don’t think I’m cut out to be an assistant. I’ve told you that before when I talked about career ladders and motherhood. I don’t feel comfortable sharing much more publicly, but I will blab away about it in person or on email.
4. We are now owners of four different coffee brewing devices. A French press, an AeroPress, a Dolce Gusto, and now a super fancy Keurig. In my defense, I only bought the French press and the AeroPress, which both cost under $15 each. But, seriously. We don’t even have a normal coffee pot but having all these crazy contraptions? I am still figuring out the Keurig since I just got it (I’ll be writing about it and doing a giveaway next month) – so any recommendations are welcome! I can’t really stomach all the waste it creates, so I might get a reusable cup, but that somewhat negates the convenient factor.
5. Mike turns 33 and Gabe turns 3 next weekend. In 2011, we had a big golden themed birthday party for the two of them. In 2012, we went to Toronto. This year we…have absolutely no plans. I am not one to throw a big ol’ birthday party every year – I just have no desire and don’t enjoy really event planning or kids’ birthday parties (hi, my name is Scrooge. Lazy, anti-social Scrooge). And we’re not traveling since we need to save money (see #3) and my sister is coming home from Chicago that weekend. SO. Any fun birthday traditions that you or your family did growing up? Please do share! I like the idea of sticking candles in every meal (and Gabe would, too!), but beyond that’s about the extent of my birthday ideas. I don’t excel at being thoughtful and giving great gifts. But you? You might! Help?