Breaking Up with Twitter.

Dear Twitter,

It’s not you, it’s me.

Really. I’m not just saying that.

Maybe if I had more self-control, it could have worked out. Maybe if I didn’t check you twelve billion times a day, we’d have been together forever. Maybe if you weren’t so darn addictive, I wouldn’t be writing this letter.

But, the truth is, T (may I call you that?), you ruined my productivity at work and I turned to you when I had anything to say – which also took a toll on my poor little blog.

I have no willpower when it comes to you. No self-restraint. I check you first thing in the morning, and must indulge in countless hits everyday. Not to mention what an enabler you are to my procrastination. I hit rock-bottom last night when I realized I had ignored my husband for hours to troll around on the internet. Hours.

This might not be forever. Someday I might come back to you, and we can have a normal, adult relationship. One that doesn’t involve infatuation, but respect.

I will re-learn how to talk to people when something funny, great, or awful happens to me. I will email people. I will stop find better venues for my procrastinating.

All my love,

@ashleymarie6

Twitter Friends –

Oh how I will miss you. Please forgive me. And then email or talk to me on gmail (ashleymarie6). Seriously. I’ll totally email you back.

Send a tweet for me,

@ashleymarie6

PS: As a part of my detox, I had a document open at work where I simply wrote anytime I felt the itch to Tweet. Just so you know what you’re missing:

• I quit Twitter. Weird.
• We’re done with our food allowance for the entire month. And it’s the 12^th. Oops.
• I told Mike I quit Twitter and he told me to just get more self-control. Grrr.
• Yay! I sold my coffee sleeve in less than 24 hours. I feel so cool. Now to make a purple argyle one tonight…
• Checking out FlyLady, because apparently I’m a 35-year-old mother of three.
• I spelled “simultaneously” right on the first try. Victory!
• Dude, I’m so much more productive without Twitter!
• FYI: Molasses in oatmeal = gingerbread oatmeal. Add some chopped walnuts and you’ve got heaven in a bowl. And it keeps me full until 1pm!
• Quarterly reports are stupid. Paperwork can suck it. (Tiny Fey inspired me to dust that phrase off and put it back into action.)
• Cleveland people: Where can I get a cheap manicure? Help my cuticles. Please.
• Holy hell, what is going ON outside? This is truly a blizzard.

So, just consider yourself lucky that I’m gone. ;)